Dad, I know you'll be reading this and then you'll read it to Mom. Hi Mom. Am I remembering this right? (Other people might find this amusing too).
All through my childhood Mom was starting little business ventures, one of which was marketing and selling Hypercolor t-shirts. Remember those? They're the ones that changed color with heat. She called it Heironymus something-or-other, not after the 15th Century Dutch painter but after this children's book she used to read me about a chameleon named Heironymus. I don't have any idea how she ever got in with the Hypercolor people, but I can tell you why. It's not that she ever wanted to be a great salesperson and she thought that she just might hit her lick and make her millions with the magic color-changing t-shirts but because she thought they were so neat, such an amazing feat of human ingenuity, this fabric that would change color when you and all your friends breathed all over it. She would be offering the world something that was not of any real technical significance, that didn't have any practical applications, but something that made people smile. She got boxes and boxes of these shirts, different styles with different clever color-changing pictures on them. I was so excited because I got my pick and I wore those shirts like crazy. I don't know what ever happened to that business, maybe it petered out for her when the whole Hypercolor craze petered out, you know, when everyone realized that after a while the shirts lost their "hyper"-power and you were stuck with a dingy non-colored t-shirt with no powers at all, that and the fact that if they did continue to work, at some point you'd inevitably find yourself standing in front of a bunch of people in a purple shirt with bright pink underarms. I don't know why it took everyone so long to realize that that would happen. In the end Mom got out of the t-shirt business and moved on to something else. They still kind of make fun of those shirts on shows like "I Love the 90's" and I always say "My Mom sold those!!!"
Goodnight, Mom, Dad. I love you.