Open letter to my high school friends on facebook

Obviouly I've done something wrong. There are those of you who still seem to have fun and do things. I see the pictures, the ones of you all smashed up with about 100 of your friends, with the funny expressions and the nonsensical comments at the bottom like "RKR Infinity!" followed by a bunch of L-ing OL. How have you maintained your youthful abilty to be entertained? How have you found so many friends and where do you guys go? Even if I had a million friends, and some cool little place where we know the owner, I wouldn't have anywhere to go with Story. What do you do with your kids? I know you have them because the picture right after the one of you dancing on a table is the one of your little darlings all dressed for their first day of school.

I guess I'm just confused. Did I age twice as fast as everyone else? Is it this place? If I move back to Missouri can I dance on tables too? Where are you making friends? Once I got out of school and wasn't forced to interact with people my age I must have gotten complacent, whereas you stayed dilligent. Come to think of it, where are all the people my age in this state? This is the weirdest place, a land of the old and young with nothing in between. I could either go hang out with my skateboard in front of the movie theater on Friday night or I could go to some sort of party where someone is selling something cute.

I like to have fun, I was never too good at making my own fun, just kind of tagged along with you, facebook friends. I like looking at your pictures, don't get me wrong. I just can't figure out why I feel so old and weary and you look so young and vibrant. One of these days I'm going to make my way up to Missouri, you know, where the party's at, for a visit. Get my table ready. Love you, friends.